As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
