I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
