I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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