I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
