We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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