The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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