What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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