this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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