I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
