oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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