brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
