just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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