I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
