This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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