Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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