This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I would fuck him just for his dog
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
