We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
