I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize