Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
