Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
