alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
