Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
Randomize
