tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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