I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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