saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize