just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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