I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
