New invention idea: vibrating tampons
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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