Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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