break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
