woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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