Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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