dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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