with your own penis?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
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