I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
