Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I'm determined to sit on that face.
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