ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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