It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
