You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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