My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
