He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Randomize