His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
