I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
