so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Randomize
