No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize