I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
