Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
