Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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