somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize
