my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
As shirtless as possible
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
