Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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